jess knows best
waso mu here. my friend jess now has a spot on my website. enjoy?
if you wanna return to my spot click here.
my name IS jess and i like chicken run and having fun and being number one.
i am better than finn because
- i am NOT an octonauts fan.
- i do NOT be bird.
- i am a pirate look out i have pirated every movie and tv show and consumed every piece of media i have ever consumed illegally. lock your windows, i'm about to pirate all the new movies from 2029. look OUT!!!
feminist reading of chicken run
today is the 23rd of january, 2024. chicken run (2000) is a movie for the feminists of the world. the male characters play little to no purpose, except one of them. rocky. but he was voiced by mel gibson, so we don't talk about him. rocky in the sequel was voiced by zachary levi, who is known for playing flynn rider in the movie tangled (2010) and toby in alvin and the chipmunks 2 (the squeakquel) (2009). zachary levi is a feminist (probably, i assume).therefore, chicken run 1 and 2 are both feminist movies for the feminists to enjoy. and they all lived happily ever after. the end. :3
mack the mackerel.
mack the mackerel. this is a tale of death and deception, and how love changes everything. mack the mackerel was a scottish mackerel until one day, he became engl*sh. scientists still do not understand how this event occured to this day, but i know. mack the mackerel...was...a...drag queen! and so that's the tale of death and deception, and how love changes everything. mack died last year, but he was actually a horrible fish who deceived everyone. love changes everything, and mack's love for drag changed his nationality :/
diary OF a wimpy fish
today i went swimming.
today i went swimming.
today i went swimming. kitchen renovations began.
today i went swimming. kitchen renovations well under way.
today i went swimming. kitchen renovations finished.
today i went swimming.
today i went swimming.
i died today.
finn isn't who they say they are *FEED MY BABY FISH* *LINK IN BIO!*
i think it goes without saying that finn (known to their six fans as 'waso mu') is very nice to those who will give them money. they just want your money GUYS! do you know how much it costs me to write a blog post? £15! i need to feed my baby fish, his name is [INSERT NAME HERE] and he is SOOOOO hungry. can someone pop to sainsbury's and get him a packet of apple sauce? sainsbury's own brand, he won't eat anything else :((
why i've been gone for so long (breaking my silence)
guys. it's been like OVER a year. i thought i'd just come on here to update you all on my baby fish that now goes by the name postman. he is doing well. someone sent some branded apple sauce to our house around seven months ago and he had an adverse reaction to it (to say the least!).
postman said his first words last friday, and they were "binoculars" and "M56 northbound". i don't exactly know how the pair correlate, so if any other fish parents have had this problem, please let me know in the description box below.
it's very important to note that postman does not want to be a postman when he grows up, he wants to be a chef in a seafood restaurant. this feels wrong, and i don't want him to feel like i'm not encouraging him to follow his dreams, but also like he's going to be cooking his dead friends and family and serving them to loyal customers. like what the fish?!
postman says he wants to type something on my blog, so the following has been typed by postman: binoculars see what grown flamenco dancers refuse to see. get out! she was a girl, he was a sheep, can i make it any more obvious?! (mary had a little lamb reference in the big 2025 🥀). watched bake off last night, wish i could bake :-( M56 northbound, that's where you will find me, the radio said that there's traffic, but do i look like i care?! i WILL drive. i WILL bake. okayyy, i'm logging out now, going to go sit in the park and blast charli xcx while throwing doritos cool original at the seagulls in the bike shelter. :P